


More than that

by Roshwen



Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-05
Updated: 2013-05-05
Packaged: 2017-12-10 12:06:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 674
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/785876
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Roshwen/pseuds/Roshwen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There are a whole lot of things John Watson is not.</p>
            </blockquote>





	More than that

There are a whole lot of things John Watson is not.

He is not a cure against old age, for instance. He won’t stop the clock from ticking so Sherlock will live forever. He is not Sherlock’s only hope, no guide or safe haven in the darkest night. He’s not a desert spring, saving travelers dying of thirst. He will smile at Sherlock’s jokes, few as they are, but even though his smile is the brightest Sherlock’s ever seen, he would hardly say it eclipses the sun.

John Watson does not look like the lovers pop songs like to sing about. He does not taste like heavy and expensive wine, the kind you can drink without getting hung-over. His eyes aren’t blooming flowers and his hair is dishwater rather than fairy tale blonde.

He is none of that, and at the same time, he’s more.

Sherlock once tried using John as the reason he couldn’t take a case, instead of being honest with himself and admitting _he_ was the one who was too spent to go catch a serial killer. That didn’t go down well.

John is not Prince Charming to show up and rescue unsuspecting maidens, not a life goal to strife for, not a stick to beat others with. Sherlock tried the last one too, but again, only once. As soon as John learned Sherlock had told Anderson John would hunt him down if he ever messed up evidence again, the consulting detective found himself face to face with a very angry ex-army doctor. Again.

John also is no guarantee for living happily ever after. Quite the opposite, in fact, with all the running around chasing criminals and whatnot. It will take a miracle for the both of them to make it to their retirement hale and hearty. Still, stranger things have happened and so, lately, Sherlock has found himself looking down upon the small man lying next to him at night, fast asleep, and silently wishing for something he can't put into words. A chance, maybe.

John Watson couldn’t give you an answer to life, the universe and everything other than 42, so him being the answer himself is obviously out of the question. There are too many scratches and screeches in his life to be a melody, the soundtrack to ‘Sherlock and John: the movie’.

His own conscience is far from clean, though he does try to fill in for Sherlock’s, which occasionally likes to take unexpected and last-minute trips to faraway places.

If he’d come at the right moment, he’d come long years ago, before the bullying and the isolation and the cocaine. But he didn’t, and Sherlock doesn’t care.

Because John is so much more.

With him, 221b has become a place to live, a home instead of a roof and four walls to crash down in. There are still patches of grey in Sherlock’s life, but now there is someone to help him find the colours back. He will come up with ideas and schemes to pull Sherlock out of the Pit of Boredom and give him something to do, something to keep his mind from tearing itself to pieces.

With John, sometimes, Sherlock can even admit to being happy. He’s no longer a Me, instead he is part of a We, something he could never dream of coming true.

There are many songs, many poets trying to fit what they have into words and all of have some small element of truth in it. But even the best effort can’t come close to reality. Reality is far too simple for poetry.

John is the change Sherlock desperately needed.

He’s not a man of many words, eager to talk about his or anyone else’s feelings. He’s not a banner Sherlock carries with him into battle, nor the final escape when all other doors are closed.

But before John limped into St. Bart’s, Sherlock was a lonely and frankly miserable man. Now, he's not, and with any luck, he'll never be again. And that will more than do.

**Author's Note:**

> [Zij maakt het verschil](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Vp4dyNP0ho)
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> This song was the inspiration for this ficlet. Unfortunately, it's in Dutch, but I still recommend you listen it. The clip itself is horrible, but the music is still good.


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